You'll never live like common people
You'll never do what common people do
You'll never fail like common people
You'll never watch your life slide out of view
And then dance and drink and screw
Because there's nothing else to do

You will never understand
How it feels to live your life
With no meaning or control
And with nowhere left to go
You are amazed that they exist
And they burn so bright
Whilst you can only wonder why.

sair de casa aos 18 anos &
se mudar pra uma cidade grande &
ter novas experiências, conhecer lugares &
conhecer pessoas e ter novos relacionamentos &
frequentar a faculdade, arrumar um emprego &
fazer coisas diferentes, cometer erros indecentes &
recomeçar tudo de novo &
se mudar de país &
conhecer outras pessoas, outras línguas, outras culturas &
sentir falta da família, dos amigos, da infância &
perder pessoas no caminho, se afastar de outras &
deixar o passado pra trás como uma árvore que solta as folhas no outono &
achar isso tão triste e tão belo &
não saber exatamente o que fazer no final &
continuar vivendo e repetindo tudo de novo.

Ginsberg told us about the best minds of his generation starving hysterical
Rimbaud told us about his season in hell
I wish I could have known this better
When I was younger as well.

The clock is ticking all the time
While I'm still struggling to find the perfect rhyme.

For every age there is a challenge
For every life there is a purpose.

Wasn't this what they were trying to tell us
Through all those pages of the bible
And of every book ever written?

Lightening
All the heavy world
Is frightening
I'm like a child in the sand
On the beach of the land of you
And I'm blue.

samba

me deixaste, feito um antigo vulcão, em erupção
me acertaste, feito bala de canhão, no meu coração
me humilhaste, feito um bobo da corte, dia e noite
me julgaste, feito um ladrão condenado, sem passado
me largaste, feito uma roupa velha, na miséria
acabaste, com minha própria razão, sem perdão.

me deixaste, feito turista perdido, sem sentido
me jogaste, da ponta do precipício, sem motivo
me arrastaste, até o fundo do poço, que desgosto
arrasaste, com a minha emoção, que humilhação

se ausentaste, quando mais necessitei,  eu bem sei
me largaste, quando eu não tinha ninguém, oh meu bem
me calaste, quando em choro eu desabei...

if I had another chance
I'd have done everything differently
I'd have done everything the same

I'd have had a different body
but my soul would've remained the same

if I had another chance
will you and me were going to meet again?

one day
not far from now
all of these problems are going to be buried
down on the ground.

Yes, they say that love is a natural feeling
That being born and crying and feeling hungry is part of the process
That we should be studying, and working, and forming a family
And search for the meaning of life through Jesus Christ the lord and saviour
Or through Buddha, the wise wanderer
Or through Mohamed, the great prophet
I just can’t stand to be those about all of this
I just can’t stand to follow their rules
I’m sick and tired of do’s that and do’s these
I’m sick and tired of not being me
Am who I am, but a product of their own meaning?
If even my rage is built at their factories
By starving working men with crying kids to feed.
I do believe in freedom, you better believe me
But where should I go to find it?
Are we all doomed by eternity
Or the stars are really the dust of what we used to be?
I have no idea and don’t think I’ll ever have
Let’s keep it up thinking, and doing, and questioning
Someday we might come with an answer.
So far we have our minds, and hearts, and freedom
It’s enough for the start
But not enough to the end
And I’m not going to wait for it
Quietly.

rush time at oxford tube station

an old man playing a jazz song in his saxophone at Oxford Circus tube station

people hurrying up to work in a tuesday morning

no one hears the song, although everyone listens to the music

I'm late for my work at a record shop

it's quite tiring but I still have to pay the rent

I'll start to study soon, try to learn how to write 

however I already know how to write

and watch life going on the underground

I guess you cannot learn this kind of things in  school.

did that old man with the saxophone went to school?

perhaps I should ask him tomorrow when we meet again at the trains platform

If he plays some Charlie Parker song, I'll know the answer straight away.

Isn't it great to listen to jazz in the morning?
just another rush time at oxford tube station.

É lógico que eu estou numa péssima fase. Eu estou numa péssima fase há 26 anos. O médico diz que eu tenho uma “disfunção patológica do humor”, o que é só um nome chique pra algum tipo de depressão, provavelmente causada pelos mesmos velhos questionamentos que eu me faço desde que li o primeiro livro da minha vida. Ele me pergunta o que eu tenho feito ultimamente, e eu digo que estou assistindo todos os episódios de Mr Robot e Bojack The Horseman e ele ri como se não entendesse e também não desse a mínima. Ai eu completo falando que também estou reescutando toda a discografia dos Replacements e ele dá de ombros, deve achar que é algum grupo de hip hop do momento. Ele me dá a receita, eu vou até a farmácia e gasto o dinheiro achando uma bobagem. Aí eu chego em casa e fico encarando as paredes, contando quantos cigarros eu fumei porque prometi que esse ano ia parar, mas eu nunca consigo cumprir nenhuma promessa mesmo.